Talk:Minkfi Yawa/@comment-26273552-20161108210518

 Rating as requested 

Writing : ★★★☆☆ Length : ★★★★* Format : ★★★★☆ Design : ★★★*☆ Final Notes:
 * Apart from some punctuation issues scattered about, the grammar is good.
 * Unfortunately, the topics are all over the map. Each paragraph should be about one thing, not multiple.
 * Just about the perfect length for a nice read.
 * As noted above, paragraphs need to be shuffled for more order.
 * I want to see more grouping here. Things about her individually should be together, while interactions with others should be their own thing.
 * Overall good character design- Unique, but not too off the wall.
 * Some discrepancies in how the character actually is. Try to avoid ambiguity if you want to convey a certain feel with a character.
 * Mmm dat sprite tho- *shot*

It's been stated multiple times now, but revisit the paragraphs, pick them apart, and reorder the sentences within. Right now, it's difficult to get through because it goes from point A to Q to N.

Also, personal preference thing, but really long Tables of Contents on Wikia are really ugly since they can fill up an entire browser's height just by themselves. You can get rid of it with in the source code if you want.

~The Second (talk) 21:05, November 8, 2016 (UTC)